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Campus Destroys Joseph Campbell Collection Because Books Say Pain Is Part of Being Human

Wisteria College invited students and faculty to a combination bonfire/book burning at the behest of campus psychiatrist Wilson Gramercy. Books, videos and other media by and about famed mythologist and professor of comparative religion Joseph Campbell were collected and shredded into mulch for the Wisteria College Peace Garden. “Dr. Campbell was a revered scholar for […]

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Faculty Lobby for Department of Unpopular Tasks. Stumble Upon Cache of Administrators.

Faculty at Phillip Seymour University celebrated Thursday when their academic governance council passed legislation to support the creation of a Department of Unpopular Tasks. “Each year, more and more busywork and nonsense is added to our plates, taking away from our focus on students,” said physics researcher Malcolm Dobbs. “Just last week I had to […]

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Office Diverts 90% of Budget to Social Media. Decline in Program Attendance Inexplicable.

The Student Activities Office (SAO) at Cumbermount College has announced a reorganization of its department in order to provide more student-friendly services. “We see lots of students walk by our events without even noticing that something is happening because they have their noses in their phones,” said Director of Student Activities Leigh Ryka. “We’ve tried […]