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Staff Member Marries the Rules in Campus Chapel

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G\"bride\"wen Gregory, assistant manager of financial services at Louisville Methodist University, married The Rules at a small private ceremony in the DCU chapel.

“Finally!” yelled junior Christie Mendez, who has worked as a student employee in the financial services office for two years. “Any student at LMU could tell you how much Gwen loves The Rules. You can try to reason with her or use logic, but nothing could ever come between Gwen and The Rules.

When asked whether she was nervous before the ceremony, Ms. Gregory said she hoped wedding guests were aware of some of the policies that could relate to the day’s nuptials. “There is a ‘no rice’ policy on page 118 of the LMU handbook,” said the bride. She didn’t seem to know why the rule existed but, since it was written down, she assumed it must be very important.