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Faculty Annoyed by Brilliant Student Until He Becomes Famous

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Mike Hozman, the technical wonderboy who annoyed all of his professors last year in college is now the most popular student in the faculty’s revisionist history. CronkNews reporters recorded the following instructor comments:

Last Year:

  • Mike is the most irritating student I’ve ever met. I can’t stand him.”

  • He’s arrogant and disruptive in class, and when I try to reason with him he acts like I’m the idiot.”

  • I don’t know how our nitwit admissions officers let students like this through the application process.”

This Year:

  • I always knew Mike’s million-dollar patent idea was a winner. I feel like I really helped him with my mentoring.”

  • Mike was an intellectual rebel. He added a lot of spice to the classroom with his free-spirited banter. If it hadn’t been for my encouragement, maybe Mike wouldn’t have had the courage to pursue his dreams.”

  • We need more students like Mike. His new laptop software is exactly the innovation we want to see from our best students. How on earth our nitwit admissions officers found him is beyond me.”

Congratulations, Kayvon Beykpour and Joe Bernstein! Your professors can’t wait to take credit for your success!