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Following Porn Controversy, University of Maryland Seeks Shock Advice from Adam Lambert

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Following the refusal of Maryland\’s state university system to comply with legislation mandating that each state college develop a porn policy, the University of Maryland assumed it had sealed its place in the Shock Value Hall of Fame. Unfortunately, their timing couldn\’t have been worse.

One member of the Board of Regents reflected, “Just when we thought we\’d hit a Shock Value one-two punch with the initial timing of the Maryland porn-based student activities program in April and the cheekiness we showed with the legislature, we were sure we\’d attract national media coverage. Then came that Lambert kid.”

Just when the Maryland story was starting to attract media attention, Adam Lambert, last year\’s American Idol runner-up, gave a truly shocking performance at the American Music Awards, including a male-male kiss.

He parlayed the performance into a second headline when Good Morning America uninvited him to appear on their show,” continued the Regent. “It really humbled us, but the kid is brilliant. Brilliant…\”

Rather than battle Lambert for shock press, rumor has it that University of Maryland has invited Lambert to serve as a private consultant for its public relations staff. “We had considered Madonna,” said a rep, “but her shock value is fading. Adam appeals to an incredibly broad demographic, very much in keeping with our public colleges.”