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Intellectuals Seek Opportunities to Teach Chris Matthews to Think about Race Every Minute

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Academics critical of Chris Matthews, whose post-State of the Union remarks that he “forgot [Obama] was black” caused ripples of controversy, have seen an opportunity to make money while improving sensitivity about issues of race.

“I\’ve suggested to Mr. Matthews that he practice silently repeating a cultural mantra whenever talking to someone with minority status,” said one consultant who calls himself “Dr. Sensitive.” “Thinking things like \’You\’re black. You\’re black. You\’re black,\’ can be a healthy way to never forget that someone is of a certain race.”

“I\’ve taken Dr. Sensitive\’s class, and I\’ve found enlightenment,” said one former client. “I have a female supervisor, and whenever she gives me orders I say \’You\’re a woman. I\’m aware that you have a vagina.\’ She gives me strange looks because she\’s not used to someone recognizing her cultural specialness so overtly, and it makes me feel incredibly diverse.”

“Chris Matthews was wrong to forget, even for one second, that our president is black,” said a particularly harsh critic. “Even though Obama didn\’t want his race to define him, but to have it instead be part of his legacy, we need to respect him by seeing only his color. We\’ve made progress as a nation, but there is still a lot of work to do.”