College Partners with Banana Republic to Enforce New Dress Code

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by Brody Truce
Senior Staff Writer

For the past three years, seniors at Chestnut View College have struggled to find employment after graduation. The college, which once boasted a 98% post-graduate employment rate, now sees only 60% of its seniors landing jobs—one of the lowest post-graduate placement rates in the country.

Perplexed by the problem, Geraldine Bruce, Director of Career Placement Services, hired prestigious higher education consultant Andrew J. Shuster of Shuster and Associates. Over a three month period, Shuster conducted an extensive review of the college’s curriculum and spoke with over five employers who had recently interviewed Chestnut View seniors.

“Mr. Shuster determined that our curriculum and programs are producing intelligent and competent graduates,” said Bruce. “But their interview outfits are simply not impressing employers.”

“Today’s market is competitive,” explained Shuster. “You can’t just walk into an interview and expect to get a job just because you’re smart. You also have to look better than everyone. That’s really the most important thing.”

Based on Shuster’s study, Chestnut View College immediately enacted a mandatory business attire dress code for all students. “We felt it was important for our students to be comfortable wearing suits and ties from day one. By the time they’re ready to interview, they’ll be able to say that they already have four years of experience wearing a suit,” said Bruce.

The college has built a $500 per semester stipend into student tuition and has opted to partner with Banana Republic, a recognized name in the world of business fashion. Each semester, students will receive a $500 Banana Republic gift card that they’ll be required to spend within the first two days of class. Reactions to the new policy are mixed.

Bryce Landon, a sophomore majoring in economics, seemed annoyed with the policy. “After a week of wearing this suit, I understand why they drink so much on Mad Men. I feel like it’s strangling my individuality. I miss being able to wear my Gap sweatshirts.”

“I’m so excited about this!” declared Britney Ellis, a junior majoring in artistic welding. “I love Banana Republic and I’m sure that one of their khaki skirt suits will help me land a job next year!”

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