by Matthew Michael Freelance Writer In his first official act as Euphoria State University’s president, Dr. Geoffrey Sumner has released the institution’s most diverse diversity statement ever. The statement—which finishes at 1,253 words—begins in English but navigates through Yiddish, Ebonics, and Spanish before ending with a flourish of Texting Slang. “IMHO, ESU haz2 M-Brace diver$iT [...]

The University of North Carolina, in an attempt to re-image itself after its Tar Heels basketball team’s terrible performance and public relations nightmares, has hired a creative team to develop fresh ideas for rebranding. Following the lead of UNC’s most famous alumnus, Michael Jordan, who rebranded himself several times throughout his career, the creative team [...]

Who:      Senior writers Irma Pelt, Brody Truce and Leah Wescott What:     The podcast of the millennium When:     6:00 p.m. Eastern Where:    blogtalkradio.com/cronknews Why:       We hate that other people have podcasts and we’re not the center of attention 24/7. Topic:      Best Practices in Staff Training

by Irma Pelt Senior Staff Writer The management team of a Target store in Millbury, Massachusetts faces conduct charges related to an end cap display believed to promote irresponsible drinking behaviors. The display featured plastic cups, table tennis balls, and a folding table. Reisman College issued the conduct meeting request after several students were caught [...]