Greg Dierstein, a freshman in Professor Romano\’s literature seminar in 1993, woke up at 3:00 a.m. last night with an enlightened revelation. “I think Dr. Romano was right when he said reading and writing are really important in the real world,” said Greg. “I\’m going to start using spellcheck so I can get that promotion […]
by Matthew Michael Freelance Writer Thanks to funding from a Republican Party grant, Gaightes College political scientist Dr. Robert Q. Heller has created the perfect candidate to run against Barack Obama in 2012: Donele Bachrump. Bachrump, a Frankenstinian-Manchurian candidate, was created from the genetic material and political leanings of current high profile Republicans, Michele Bachmann […]
by Alexander Riche Freelance Writer In a surprise move last month, the Library of Congress announced its intent to acquire all posts since March 2006 from social media site Twitter. The reaction was swift. Markus Trinion, a doctoral student doing his dissertation on faculty attitudes toward technology, described his frustration at the venerable institution\’s surprise […]
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