by Schubert Lovenkraft Freelance Writer College officials have confirmed that yesterday’s mysterious campus-wide tremor was likely caused by a sudden horrified gasp from senior faculty at an afternoon Faculty Senate meeting in Old Main. Seismographic readings from the Geology lab in Shaffer Hall traced the source of the tremor to the center section of seating […]
Newly inaugurated college president LuAnne Marberth of Hawthorn Polytechnic admits she is stymied by her inability to woo the faculty at her new institution. Marberth arrived at Hawthorn after twelve years as Vice President of Athletics at Fillmore University and three years under the mentorship of the professional headhunting agency We Make Presidents. “I did […]
by Sasha Tremento Freelance Writer In what Barston College President Myron Pilsney calls a “win-win solution,” cutting costs but maintaining faculty morale, the college is promoting professors granted tenure directly to emeritus status. “It addresses the fiscal climate,” he told an uncharacteristically quiet faculty senate yesterday, “while maintaining morale. Tenure-track assistant professors have worked very […]
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