by AJ Marshfield Freelance Writer In an unprecedented example of how college is not exactly like the movies, 19-year-old Nancy Whittaker has discovered she is not best friends with her college roommate, Morgan McDaniels. “It’s nothing at all like ‘Felicity’ or even Van Wilder…it’s like we don’t even talk,” said Whittaker, while filling out a […]
by Diana Senechal Warwick, RI—Inundated with research studies about the social inconveniences caused by bright students, many colleges have begun to expel them or make their lives miserable. “Enough,” declared Gertrude Genoeg, president of Meson College. “Let’s not expel the geniuses. Believe it or not, we need them.” (“Who is ‘we’?” asked one of the […]
by Monty Tufnel and Henry Wenslydale Freelance Writers In an unprecedented move, Smothers University announced today that it has eliminated math requirements from all its degree programs and will guarantee its students and graduates lifetime outsources for their math needs. Yet-to-be-named firms in India and China will offer 24-hour “mathematical literacy” service to Smothers’ students […]
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