Trustees of Cooper College held an emergency meeting over the weekend to decide how to respond to billionaire George Muff’s offer to donate 51% of the much-needed revenue to build a new football stadium. “During these economic times, it’s been extremely difficult to find a donor,” said board president Kerwin Standish, “but come on. He’s [...]

According to real-life admissions officers, here are the year’s most popular majors, as requested by high school seniors. 1. CSI – with a study abroad option at CSI Miami 2. Graphic Lit 3. Pre-dental sorority membership with extra teeth whitening 4. ROTC with World of Warcraft option 5. Nonfeminist Vampire Studies Think we’re exaggerating? Ask [...]

Barely beating out two other colleges this year, Portland Maine University (PMU) became the first institution in the country to recruit a perfect freshman class. “Faculty and staff have been urging us to recruit perfect students,” said director of enrollment, Tobey Tuttle, “and this year we got sick of the requests and just did it. [...]

Children of rich dignitaries who had once dreamed of coasting through high school then attending the University of Illinois have been forced to focus on new goals since the University was caught making preferential admissions decisions for applicants from privileged families. “I really wanted to go to U of Illinois,” said one high school junior [...]

In a recent press conference, Chinese diplomats were quoted as saying, “Hey, United States! We’re rubber and you’re glue. What you say bounces off our honorable country and sticks to you.” America’s easiest human rights scapegoat, China, took advantage of the admissions scandal at the University of Illinois to show the world that it’s really [...]

Description At the lovely, highly competitive University of Cambridge, we set the bar for academics and reading admissions essays. Every single one of those darn essays. The Director of Admissions serves as chief public relations office regarding the topic of reading admissions essays. Relationships with students and the parents who spent thousands of dollars on [...]