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An End to Student “Affairs” at Robertus Magnus Magnificus

Posted on Thursday, August 26th 2010
Tags: department, names, office, political correctness
An End to Student “Affairs” at Robertus Magnus Magnificus
by Erica Price Freelance Writer A vote of no confidence was postponed this week at Robertus Magnus Magnificus College in Shellsbury Maryland, indicating growing support for the college’s president, Monsignor Edgar Shriver. Monsignor Shriver’s alleged lack of vision and leadership had raised considerable concerns since he took office last year, but a renewed laser-sharp focus [...]

Naive Administrators Toil Over Budget Requests that Will Never Be Considered

Posted on Thursday, December 10th 2009
Tags: budget, budgets, department, proposal, requests, successful
Naive Administrators Toil Over Budget Requests that Will Never Be Considered
As deadlines for 2010-11 departmental budget requests approach, idiot administrators, like Women’s Center director Judy Whacket of St. Bingham College, toil away, believing that if they can just find the right wording on their requests, their departments will receive increases for the first time in over fifteen years. “Oh, give me a break,” said St. [...]

Old Guard Physics Profs Request Secession

Posted on Friday, October 23rd 2009
Tags: college, collegiality, conflicts, department, politics, university
Old Guard Physics Profs Request Secession
Physics professors at Swanson University hope to set a new precedent for academic governance by creating two new distinct Physics departments known as “The Old Guard” and “The Whippersnappers.” “Those new kids, with their innovative teaching techniques and disregard for department traditions are just a pain,” said Evalyn Lovelace, the proposed interim chair of the [...]

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